...to seriously talk about what's going on in my world. And it pains me to say that right now, that is most definitely not the case. Not the case for this particular issue. It's stupid, I know it is.....but it is the way it is, and I don't know what to do about it. I really want to talk it out with someone, but I honestly don't want anyone all in my business, and I feel like talking about it means that I'll be making it a bigger deal than what it is. But I'm going crazy keeping it all inside...and I'm praying about it...but I'm seriously not hearing, not understanding...I'm just not....and that's driving me even more insane. What am I supposed to be doing?!?
Yell it at me. I need to know. All I know is what I want to do, and I'm not sure if that want is my fleshly side, or if that want is there b/c that's what You would have me do. I don't know...and then I thought my answer was delivered to me when he didn't respond to me, and that was something I was gonna have to grapple with, but at least I had my answer...and now he has responded...like there was no time in between. He just picked up the conversation where we left off....my chest is in knots right now b/c I want to respond. I want to respond like now. When I heard my phone light up (with texts) like 15 thousand times I knew exactly where they were coming from...and it took a lot for me to open them...and like my heart often does when it comes to him...it started beating a lot and I started freaking out internally. Ugh...and now I'm so confused.
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